When we go on a journey of physical transformation, or emotional and internal transformation, the journey is most often judged only by us.
We are the only ones who can truly know if what we are doing is in alignment with our personal values, right?
But what if we stopped to see how the actions we are taking in our own lives impact and inspire the people around us?
In this special client success story episode, I am thrilled to not only talk to my client, Michelle, but also her husband, as we discuss how the decisions Michelle was making not only impacted her life but the differences they made in her husband’s life as well.
But before we hear Michelle’s story, I want to tell you that now is the time to transform your own life. If you are ready to transform your life from the inside out, I want to invite you to get on a call with me so that I can help you.
Living with a Chronic Sense of Overwhelm
When Michelle initially made the decision to reach out to me for coaching, she did so because she was living with a sense of chronic overwhelm.
She was under a lot of pressure at work, while also returning to school and dealing with the loss of a family member. Before she knew it, she had gained 20 lbs and she couldn’t seem to figure out how to get it off.
Her initial goal was to lose the weight. But like the majority of women I work with, her physical self wasn’t the issue that needed addressing first.
We had to dig into her root causes and find those deeper issues that were causing her health to suffer. We don’t gain weight overnight so it’s always important to find the real reasons for it rather than go on some crazy diet to lose weight.
Living in Alignment with Your Personal Values
Weight loss is the carrot that is dangled before our noses by so many people. It is seen as the end-all, be-all for happiness.
I have shared my story on this podcast many times of losing a large amount of weight only to find that happiness and fulfillment weren’t waiting for me on the other side. It took more than weight loss for me to find that fulfillment.
And it was the same for Michelle.
She had to change many things in her life but the first was the way she spoke to herself. She had to learn to speak to herself with compassion. Out with the trash talk and in with being grateful for her body and seeing it for the wonder it is.
Because of her busy schedule with school and work, she had to find ways to be present for her family when all she wanted to do was zone out and eat takeout. One concrete step she took was learning how to meal plan.
When she learned how to live in alignment with her personal goals and values, she found that she actually had more time in her day, even though she was getting more done.
Learning to Love Your Body
Michelle’s husband, Michael, says that one of the first things he noticed was her response to his telling her she looked beautiful.
Her response had always been, “Ugh,” when he told her she looked beautiful because she truly didn’t believe him.
Every morning, when dressing for work, she asked Michael how she looked, and every morning, she walked away disgusted with herself even though he was encouraging.
Since we’ve been working together for the past year, Michelle hasn’t asked Michael how she looks in the morning. She has the body confidence now to know that she looks beautiful and she isn’t looking to someone else to tell her.
Making Time for Meal Planning and Food Prep
After work, their evenings were spent vegging on the couch, with little to no energy for their two puppies.
They had a fridge full of food that never got cooked because they lacked the energy to make a plan and prepare the meals.
This caused a vicious cycle of eating takeout, feeling crappy from the takeout, not having the energy to meal plan or cook because they felt crappy, so eating takeout again, and on and on.
They now sit down every week and meal plan together. And if they’re too tired to cook one night, they enjoy leftovers instead of ordering takeout.
Now they’re eating meals together, so they are able to enjoy each other’s company as well as spending time playing with and cuddling their fur babies.
Growing in Self-Confidence
I always define self-confidence as doing what you say you’re going to do for yourself. We had to work toward building up Michelle’s self-confidence.
She says that the first thing that showed up as self-confidence in her life was finally making it onto her own list.
Can you relate? How many of us literally aren’t on our own list?
Michelle is now her own priority. She has realized that taking care of herself isn’t selfish; it’s selfless. Her ability to care for those around her is only enhanced when she takes time for herself.
Her growing self-confidence has also allowed her to influence the next generation. She has a young niece whom she wants to help understand the value of food and family, and why her decisions in that area are so important.
Getting Comfortable with Who You Are
Another thing that Michelle has noticed about herself is how she is now showing up as her authentic self to others.
She was always afraid to be who she was, afraid of how others would react to her. But she has come to understand that no matter who you are, you are going to affect others, either for the better or for the worse.
The fact is, we only get this one life, ladies. We get this one shot to be ourselves, to be genuine in our interactions with others, and to explore and share who we really are.
Michelle made the decision to take off the mask and to be vulnerable with others, to show up as herself.
She knows that for every person she inspires, she may trigger someone else. But if she can inspire one person through being her authentic self, she feels as though she’s done what she is meant to do.
Michael has noticed that Michelle has taken on projects that before, she wouldn’t have had the confidence to do. She knows what she is capable of and isn’t afraid to step out into the unknown or to do something she’s never done before.
Do What You Need to Do
What do you want?
Do you want more self-confidence? What about losing weight or feeling better when you get dressed? Do you want to eat more meals at home or be more present for your family?
Michelle wanted all of those things and what she knows now is that she had to do what she needed to do to get where she wanted to be. She had to take radical responsibility for her own life to say, “I don’t like this situation or the way I feel about this. I’m going to do whatever I need to do to overcome it.”
An example I love where Michelle did this is when she got a tattoo on the part of her body she hated the most.
So now, whenever she sees that body part, she sees the beautiful tattoo and is reminded that she can accept herself, every part. *Listen in to hear where she got her tattoo!
Holding Your Plans Loosely
Michelle used to hold onto things with an iron grip.
Michael spoke about the itineraries they used to create for their vacations. Even Michelle said their vacations were planned down to 15-minutes increments.
But recently, they were on vacation with family, and they were caring for their 2-year old niece while her parents went inside an amusement park.
Michael and Michelle also intended to take their niece into the park but on the way, they passed a swimming pool surrounded by sand.
Their niece plopped down in the sand and began to play.
Michael waited for Michelle to convince the little girl to leave her play so they could follow their plan for the day. But instead, Michelle entered into the child’s play and they all spent a happy 4 hours playing in the sand and just being together.
Are You Ready for Change?
Michelle spent several months before she came to me researching what she needed to do to create the true change she wanted in her life. She knew she needed to do something completely different than anything she had done in the past.
When we jumped on a call together, Michelle was unprepared for the time commitment required to see the results she wanted to see.
But she also knew that if she kept doing what she had been doing, she would keep getting the same results. She needed to learn new skills and how to dig deep into her root causes in order to make changes at the ground level.
What she learned was that one change leads to another and another. And before she knew it, she had arrived at a place she never thought she would see.
Her advice to others considering coaching is to go all in.
“When you surrender, and you allow yourself to just go all in, when you lean into the process and trust it, and you follow through, amazing things happen.” ~Michelle Mullen
Are you ready to make yourself a priority in your life?
There may be many layers of this onion that you have to peel back before you get to all the root causes. If you don’t know where to start, I am here to help.
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